Hello everyone! How’s your day going? Aren’t you thankful you have a job today? By the time this will go “live,” our work week will be in full swing and, sometimes, it’s easy to forget about all the positive things our job brings to our lives as we are faced with all the negative things about our jobs that tend to catch the majority of our focus. For me, I have been taking a few minutes each morning to reflect on those positive aspects of my job and making a conscious effort to approach my job with a positive and authentic attitude.
I am so excited about the changes that are happening in me that I am writing this post just a few hours after my last post went up on Sunday. In my last post, I did my best to share how I have been refocusing on the thoughts that empowered this weight loss journey. Today, I want to flesh that out a little more. To do that, I have to open a few locked doors and let you into my mind a little bit. While I admit that I am extremely apprehensive about this, I also acknowledge that this process is absolutely necessary.
When I began to understand and believe that I have the power to control my thoughts and live the life that I want to live, I was empowered to engage in a process of change that has led to the loss of 120 pounds. This one, single thought was like a bomb in the middle of my former patterns of thinking which were the very opposite of the statement I just made. Before I realized the power I have over who I am, I had a lot of thinking errors that excused and justified the very unhealthy life that I was living.
The biggest thinking error that I have ever used was that I was a victim of my life and my circumstances. I’m not even sure that this was an active thought in my life. Somewhere along the line, I began viewing myself as less than the author of my life’s story. For the most part, I seen myself in much more of a reactive role in my life. Honestly, I believed that this was typical for most everybody else and only the lucky ones catch a break that allows them to live above their circumstances.
This thinking error fueled a thought pattern that allowed me to play the victim in every area of my life that I found to be less than desirable. It would be impossible to identify them all, but I want to give you a sample so that you can understand the point I am trying to make.
- Undesirable Life Reality: I weighed 450 pounds.
- Thinking Error: Bad genes have been cruel to me and I can never be at a healthy weight like everyone else. (I can’t control it)
- Undesirable Life Reality: I have a low self-esteem.
- Thinking Error: My past experiences and mistakes have tainted my life and left me damaged. I am unworthy and will never be as good as anybody else. (I can’t change it)
- Undesirable Life Reality: I have experienced repeated perceived rejections by authority figures.
- Thinking error: They all can see that I am not good enough and, thus, have never seen the benefit of investing in my life in any meaningful way. They identify those with potential and spend their time where it is worthwhile. (This is just who I am)
Again, this list could go on and on, but that’s already enough for me to begin experiencing some of those past thoughts that kept me defeated for so long. Looking to the past can only give me information about how to move forward. Lingering too long, especially this close to actually believing those things, can only bring up painful beliefs and tempt me to pick them back up.
Back in September, my friend, Elizabeth, shared her story with me of how she took control of her weight by taking control of what she ate. Regardless of anything else I had ever heard up to that point in my life, Elizabeth sparked a hope within me that I had the power to take control of my weight. Within weeks, I was losing weight at a pace I never thought possible. This experience is what began overtly challenging these thinking errors that I had held dear for so long. I could not continue to believe that I can’t control my weight when I was so clearly doing just that.
By tapping into the power to take control of my weight, I was beginning to tap into the power to change my thoughts, which empowered me to begin changing my behavior and, thus, I began to take control of who I am. Through these very liberating weeks of incredible change, I was breaking changes of bondage that were holding me captive. Chains forged by nothing more than my own thinking errors and faulty perceptions.
A quick review of my pictures alone will show you that much more than just my weight was changing! My eyes, the very windows to my soul, were radiating with a light that hadn’t been seen in them since pictures before I was old enough to experience those things that began contributing to the thinking errors I had developed. For the first time in my life, I was experiencing the hope that I was the author of my story and that I decide, today, what my reality will be rather than having my reality be dictated by circumstances that are out of my control or past experiences that I can’t change.
If you have never experienced this type of thinking error, my words my seem frivolous or small, but for those of you that read this that know the weight of similar chains, you know exactly what I am talking about and how life-altering this realization was!
I have the power to change my thoughts and live the life I want to live. -Me
If you are going to understand my journey and the renewed focus of my blog, you HAVE to understand that my success was never about the number on a scale. No, my success is found in the daily decisions I make to take my life back from a dark, and defeating, prison of my own thinking errors. Sorry, dear reader, but it’s not a solitary war I had to overcome. It’s a daily battle – one that is not easy, but one that is SO empowering, liberating, and WORTH IT!
As I watch the word count continue to rise, I want so desperately to continue with what I am sharing, but I know there will be other posts… other opportunities to share my journey. Thank you for taking the time to read this post and please let me know what you think.
For now, though, it’s back to taking my life back. Find me on social media:
- Facebook @250pounds2forever